Fashionably Dead In Diapers

Autor: Robyn Peterman
Publisher:
ISBN: 9781941377000
File Size: 18,42 MB
Format: PDF, ePub, Mobi
Read: 6834
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And I thought being half Vampyre/half Demon was hard...That's nothing compared to being a mother. Sweet baby Moses in a boob tube, there aren't any books on raising True Immortals so let me give you a few tips... Make a map of every closet and bathroom in your home if you enjoy having sex. Sleep deprivation can cause confusion and a map will help if you only have seven minutes and thirty-one seconds. You're welcome. Parenting books are useless if you're not human. If your child is half Vampyre/ half Demon I would suggest not using parenting books at all--they can backfire like a mother humper. Trust me on this. Have sex. When your child tells you he has an imaginary friend, do not discount this as fantasy. Often times your child isn't imagining anything. If he persists with alarming and violent stories about this fictional buddy it's probably a Troll. Do a thorough search of your home and kill it. Decapitation works best. Some imaginary friends are harmless. However, it's wise not to take chances. Have sex again. When in large crowds, make sure you hold tight to your child's hand. Losing a child in an amusement park is terrifying. If you're truly paranoid a parent could consider putting a chip in their child. If you do this don't discuss it at dinner parties. People will think you are weird. At least cuddle. Playing with dolls is fun. Being one? No so much. If your child ever finds a Genie in a bottle, flush it immediately. Many children wish for things that are very difficult to reverse...like being doll sized. If this happens, move to Oz. There are many people of small stature there. And yes, it really does exist. Find a closet and go to town.

How Hard Can It Be

Autor: Robyn Peterman
Publisher: Kensington Publishing Corp.
ISBN: 1601830629
File Size: 28,91 MB
Format: PDF, ePub
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What happens when an accountant decides to grab life by the horns and try something new? Apparently a pirate named Dave, a lot of pastel fleece, and blackmail--just to start with. . . Visualize and succeed, Oprah said. I was sure as hell trying, even if my campaign to score a job as the local weather girl had ended in a restraining order. Okay, TV was not my strength. But a lack of talent has never stopped me before. Which is why I've embarked on a writing career. I mean, how hard can it be to come up with a sexy romance? Leave it to me to wind up in a group of porno writing grannies who discuss sex toys and apple cobbler in the same breath. Also leave it to me to leak an outlandish plot idea to a bestselling author with the morals of a rabid squirrel. And only I could get arrested for a jewelry heist I didn't commit--by a hunky cop whose handcuffs just might tempt me to sign up for a life of crime. Maybe I've found my calling after all. . . "For a good time, read Robyn Peterman!" --Michelle Rowen, national bestselling author "A zany over-the-top rompfest." --Lexi George, author of Demon Hunting in a Dive Bar "Outrageous, profane, hilarious, sexy and all kinds of wacky!" --Michelle Rowen, national bestselling author 91,500 Words

Fashionably Late

Autor: Beth Kendrick
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
ISBN: 1416516506
File Size: 47,19 MB
Format: PDF, Kindle
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From a winning voice in fiction -- the author of My Favorite Mistake and Exes and Ohs -- comes a romantic comedy that will have you in stitches. She's late for her life... Becca Davis has always played it safe -- denying her passion for fashion design in a dead-end job and letting her pragmatic boyfriend (mastermind of the "Kevin Bradley Ten-Year Plan") make the tough decisions in life. Stunned into saying yes when Mr. Predictable springs a surprise proposal on her, Becca realizes that she's running out of time to turn her life around. She's only got one more chance to chase her dreams and no one -- not her control freak fiancé, not her dramaholic sisters, not her overprotective parents -- will talk her out of it. He's right on time. Terrified but determined, Becca breaks off her engagement, moves in with her sister in Los Angeles, and prepares to take the fashion world by storm. The reality of the Hollywood scene is much harsher than she anticipated -- lots of slamming doors, snooty clients, and double-crossing celebrity stylists -- but she won't give up. And while she's waiting for her big break, she meets Connor, a sexy risk-taker who's the polar opposite of her ex-fiancé. Is Becca ready for his all-or-nothing approach to love? With her design business taking off and her family starting to fall apart, she's about to learn the timeliest lesson of all: Love and fashion wait for no woman.

Advanced Style

Autor: Ari Seth Cohen
Publisher: powerHouse Books
ISBN: 1576876314
File Size: 59,16 MB
Format: PDF, Mobi
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Advanced Style is Ari Seth Cohen’s blog-based ode to the confidence, beauty, and fashion that can only be achieved through the experience of a life lived glamorously. It is a collection of street fashion unlike any seen before—focused on the over-60 set in the world’s most stylish locales. The (mostly) ladies of Advanced Style are enjoying their later years with grace and panache, marching to the beat of their own drummer. These timeless images and words of wisdom provide fashion inspiration for all ages and prove that age is nothing but a state of mind. Ari Seth Cohen started his blog inspired by his own grandmother’s unique personal style and his lifelong interest in the put-together fashion of vibrant seniors. Each of his subjects sparkles like a diamond after long years spent refining and perfecting their individual look and approach to life. The Advanced Style book will showcase, in luscious full-color, the best of the blog, but will also act as a true guidebook with all-new material featuring wardrobes, interviews, stories, and advice from a cadre of his most chic subjects, along with a large selection of never-before-seen photography—fresh off of sidewalk catwalks around the world!

Arrest Proof Yourself

Autor: Dale C. Carson
Publisher: Chicago Review Press
ISBN: 1613748078
File Size: 72,75 MB
Format: PDF, ePub
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This essential “how not to” guide explains how to act and what to say in the presence of police to avoid unnecessary arrests for petty offenses or mistakes in judgment that can lead to permanent disqualification from jobs, financing, and education. From what to do if a cop asks to search the car to dealing with a racial slur or how to handle a roach in the ashtray, this handbook details the nuances of dealing with the police. This revised and expanded edition of Arrest-Proof Yourself includes more than 100 pages of new information to reflect changes in police technique and “proactive policing.” More than 50 pages are dedicated to weaponry—including how to legally own and handle guns and knives and which firearms to use for self-defense—and updates examine topics such as the current surveillance state and the ability of police to track movements and activities using data drawn from cell phones and computers. Sprinkled with not only moral outrage but also the weird humor that permeates law enforcement, this urgent, eye-opening exposé has stories from 30 years of case files, making it the go-to guide to police procedures for all Americans.

Fashionably Dead

Autor: Robyn Peterman
Publisher: Robyn\Peterman
ISBN: 9780989496025
File Size: 40,91 MB
Format: PDF
Read: 6880
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When Astrid tries to stop smoking she ends up a member of the undead. She had never believed in vampyres before, but now she knows that they do exist no matter what she thought before.

The Westing Game

Autor: Ellen Raskin
Publisher: Puffin
ISBN: 9780140386646
File Size: 48,27 MB
Format: PDF, ePub
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The mysterious death of an eccentric millionaire brings together an unlikely assortment of heirs who must uncover the circumstances of his death before they can claim their inheritance, in a special twenty-fifth edition that features a brand new cover. A Newbery Medal Book & ALA Notable Book. Reissue.

Fashionably Dead Down Under

Autor: Robyn Peterman
Publisher: Fashionably Dead Down Under
ISBN: 9780989496049
File Size: 15,82 MB
Format: PDF, ePub
Read: 1886
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"Welcome to hell. Literally. The Hell where the Prince of Darkness is hotter than Hades, Hell Hounds smell like brownies and the Seven Deadly Sins are addicted to Facebook...Not to mention the soundtrack in the Underworld is Journey. For real. I should have known no good could come from offing my parents in the space of twenty minutes no matter how psychotic and evil they were... Now I find out my family tree includes almost every deity and mythological being alive while Ethan, the one and only love of my undead life has a limited time down under before he turns to dust. In the land of Sin, you'd think I'd get some nookie time with my man, but no. Baby Demons, cousins and grandparents put the kibosh on that. Blue balls are the new normal. What the hell does a half-Vampyre Half-Demon have to do to catch a break? Apparently find a freakin' sword, calm Mother Nature's unmedicated mood swings and make sure Mister Rogers keeps his sticky fingers to himself during weekly poker with the Devil. And I have three days to do it. By all that's unholy, I thought Ethan's Vampyre family was crazy... Trust me, they have nothing on the Demons,"--back cover.

Motion Sickness

Autor: Lynne Tillman
Publisher: Red Lemonade
ISBN: 1935869035
File Size: 63,98 MB
Format: PDF, Docs
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For the narrator of Motion Sickness, life is an unguided tour. Adrift in Europe, she improvises a life and a self. In London, she's befriended by an expatriate American Buddhist and her mysterious husband, or may or may not be stalking her. In Paris, she shacks up with Arlette, an art historian obsessed with Velazquez;s painting "Las Meinas." In Amsterdam, she teams up with a Belgian friend, who is studying prostitutes, and she tours Italy with deeply mismatched English brothers. And, as with an epic journey, the true trajectory is inwards, ever inwards, into her own dreams and desires...